Friday, February 25, 2011
Is this real?
I guess for the past 8 months the thought of actually bringing home a baby has been in the back, most hidden place in my mind. Feeling him move, seeing his crib all ready and waiting, you would think that these things would help me into reality. Not at all. I feel like a first time mom, the one's that have no clue as to how life is going to change. I have become so comfortable and set in my ways that the thought of something so drastic changing all that is ridiculous. I want nothing more than to meet my little guy, and the anticipation is killing me, im just scared. I am scared of how the girls will react of how Wes and I will have to re-adjust, of everything. I would have thought, hey this is baby #3, I should be a pro...I feel like a scared little girl walking down the path of the unknow. It is just so bizarre. I know that once he is here adjusting will be a cinch, but just thinking about it makes me anxious. I only have a few short weeks left and everything is pretty much set. I can't believe the time is here and our long journey of infertility and even loss are over. We got the miracle we set out for. I just pray that these last few weeks and even the weeks after his birth run smoothly.